Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
1–20 (174)
tiny.ag/dliywafc · ★★☆☆ Fair (888 ratings) · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw · ★★☆☆ Fair (934 ratings) · submitted 1997
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/amzxlbug · ★★☆☆ Fair (148 ratings) · submitted 1997
All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · ★★☆☆ Fair (67 ratings) · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · ★★☆☆ Fair (121 ratings) · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · ★★☆☆ Fair (93 ratings) · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · ★★☆☆ Fair (234 ratings) · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · ★★☆☆ Fair (140 ratings) · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/7hdzmwue · ★★☆☆ Fair (246 ratings) · submitted 1997
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
George Bernard Shaw, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/np9dvtka · ★★☆☆ Fair (64 ratings) · submitted 1997
Ninety percent of everything is crap.
tiny.ag/dxokyfu8 · ★★☆☆ Fair (95 ratings) · submitted 1997
It's better to be quotable than to be honest.
tiny.ag/kdbyxotm · ★★☆☆ Fair (80 ratings) · submitted 1997
Power does not corrupt. Fear corrupts... perhaps the fear of a loss of power.
tiny.ag/dtxsg5kf · ★★☆☆ Fair (127 ratings) · submitted 1997
A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is statistics.
tiny.ag/0ihiksxu · ★★☆☆ Fair (57 ratings) · submitted 1997
On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.
H. Allen Smith, Let the Crabgrass Grow, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/itutlzy5 · ★★☆☆ Fair (242 ratings) · submitted 1997
The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
tiny.ag/ixldmygb · ★★☆☆ Fair (287 ratings) · submitted 1997
A reasonable man adapts himself to suit his environment. An unreasonable man persists in attempting to adapt his environment to suit himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
George Bernard Shaw, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/wqt4ciab · ★★☆☆ Fair (91 ratings) · submitted 1997
A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.
tiny.ag/asecpbyl · ★★☆☆ Fair (76 ratings) · submitted 1997
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern.
tiny.ag/9m1hmtxp · ★★☆☆ Fair (160 ratings) · submitted 1997
When a man wants to murder a tiger, it's called sport; when the tiger wants to murder him, it's called ferocity.
tiny.ag/lkgjcwse · ★★☆☆ Fair (76 ratings) · submitted 1997
Baloney is flattery so thick that it can not be true and blarney is flattery so thin that we like it.
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